Is It a Pebble or a Mountain?

When I come upon a situation, and I have to make a decision... Sometimes it is very easy and other times it is very difficult. Sometimes the decision or problem is so small that it is barely a pebble in my path and other times, it seems like I am asked to climb a mountain when I have to make a choice.

Pebble or mountain? What makes the difference? What makes some decisions mountains and other decisions seem so small and insignificant? Sometimes a decision seems small because we feel it is "out of our control." Other times it is because it is a learned response. Still other times it is because we really don't care one way or another.. we leave it up to others to choose.

What makes a decision a mountain? What makes a choice hard to make? The reason some choices are hard to make is because they are very important to us, to our families, to people we care about. We are afraid to trust ourselves to make the right choice.

When I am faced with a difficult decision I ask myself the following questions:

1. What is the emotion I am feeling around this decision? (Is it fear, anxiety, excitement, overwhelm, confusion, indecision....)

2. What is the basis for this emotion? ( Fear of failure? Overwhelm at the size of the project or decision?...)

3. What support do I have in making this decision? (We don't get support unless we ask.)

4. What is my "why"? Why do I want to do this? (If our "why" is big enough the choice is simpler)

5. How would I feel, what would my life be like if I am successful with this decision?

6. What would my like be like if I choose not to try?

7. What is the "worse possible outcome" if I to do this and it fails. Can I live with it?

Most of the time, after answering the above questions, I find that as my mother frequently told me: I am "making a mountain out of a mole hill." The reason I tend to do this is based in emotional thinking. I allow my emotions to color my thinking. I focus on the emotion of the moment instead of the outcome I am looking to achieve.